Teaching Peace to Preschoolers

This week, I had the opportunity to be “Parent of the Day” at my daughter’s preschool, Eden Cooperative Nursery School, in Eden, New York. We chose this school for her specifically because it was community-based, cooperative (meaning it is co-owned by the families and teachers) and utilized the Montessori method of education. One of the things that first drew my interest several years ago to the Montessori approach to early childhood education was the Peace Table. The Peace Table is a place in the classroom for children to resolve conflicts between themselves. (I can hear you’re thinking : preschoolers resolving conflict by themselves? REALLY?). Really.

On the wall next to the Peace Table

The Montessori approach is to education focuses on teaching children through the practical environment. And while it stresses independence, it also builds interdependence through modeling relationship skills to children. So when children have an escalating conflict in the Montessori classroom, they are invited to the Peace Table where they talk through their problems.

Peace Table

Peace Table at Eden Co-Op

In most classrooms, the  “Peace Talk” begins by ringing a bell, placing a hand on the heart or holding the Peace Rose to signal whose turn it is to talk, and then using “I” statements to describe the feelings they experienced due to each other’s behavior, apologizing and working out the problem. Teachers may help children through this process early on in the year but as time goes on in the classroom, the children will usually start to go to the table themselves when needed.

The Peace Table and Talk are part of an overall approach to peace education that is included in the Montessori method. Watch the great video clip below that describes how children benefit from early education in peace and conflict resolution.

Educating for Peace Video

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Celebrating Success with our First Community Hero: Diane Vigrass – Part I

The Wonderful Diane

We’re pleased to profile Prevention Educators’ first Community Hero, Diane Vigrass. Diane is an educator with over 30 years of experience who has worked in several high-profile positions in our community. We had the pleasure of working with her originally when she was the Superintendent for the Diocese of Buffalo Catholic school system. We continued our partnership when she was the Associate Director at the Model Transitions Program at the Center for Rehabilitation Synergy at the University at Buffalo. Currently, she is the Special Education School Improvement Specialist for Niagara-Olean BOCES. Wherever and for whomever she has worked with in our community, Diane has kept social justice at the forefront of her work. Whether pressing her principals to proactively address bias-based bullying in the Catholic schools, providing training on culturally competent services for individuals with disabilities, or coaching teachers to make their IEPs more child-centered, Diane has taken a leadership role in the organizations she’s worked with.  She completed her BS in Education from Medaille College and her MS in Learning and Behavioral Disorders from Buffalo State College.

Jeanette sat down with Diane recently to discuss her work, its relation to social justice, how she motivates those she works with as a supervisor, trainer, or coach. They also discussed the importance of bridging the gap between families and educators.  In this three-part series, we’ll highlight some of the main points in that conversation related to working with parents, teachers and across systems. This first post will focus on working with parents. We think you’ll agree that Diane is a true Community Hero!

Jeanette: What has it been for you to keep a social justice focus at the front of your work?

Diane: Because I work with students with disabilities, it’s been a natural fit. I’m on a campaign to make sure that people understand that special education is not a lifelong sentence. It doesn’t have to be a lifelong sentence. And that’s what the crux of a lot of my work is in the school districts now. We need to wean the child away from special ed wherever possible by teaching strategies to compensate for the disability, making experts and supports available as needed and then getting out of the way so that youth can apply those strategies, whether that’s in post-secondary education or in their job.

Jeanette: Well, what would you want to say more specifically about that?

Diane: Let’s start with parents…There’s a lot that happens at the IEP (Individualized Education Plan) meetings (for children with disabilities). There is so much that can make the parent nervous because of how it’s presented, the format, all the people, the body language of those “experts” at the meeting. But parents need to be very active in their child’s education, especially if they are parenting a student with disabilities.

Jeanette: I think a lot of parents don’t understand what their role is at an IEP meeting and what the rights of the family and child are, even though they get the packet and the letters that describe the procedures. Being a parent of a child with special needs, I’ve heard other parents say, “I didn’t know I could ask for, e.g., speech.” Or “I know they have this parent support person there at the IEP but I didn’t know who she was because they had 10 other people there and I was overwhelmed.”

Diane: I wish I could tell parents to be in control. To be comfortable being active in their child’s life…The parents are the first teacher, the parents are the people that know them (the students) inside out and upside down. So when a child is having a problem, the parent’s input should be considered very valuable by the educators.  On the other hand, the educators have the training about learning and instruction.  When parents and educators listen to each other, an effective plan will develop through mutual understanding  about what’s best for that child.

Jeanette: When we go out to train a school community, we’ll often hear the parents talk about their issues with the teachers and the teachers talk about their issues with the parents.  It’s often done in an “us vs. them” mentality.  How do you think we keep the children’s needs front and center?

Diane: First, I think it’s about creating those teachable moments. It doesn’t start in high school. It’s way back in the elementary years or even before, at ages 3-4. It’s important to teach children how to ask for information they need, especially in a group. And especially for the child with a disability. Self-advocacy is so important in post-secondary life. We (parents and teachers together) have to make sure students with disabilities are ready for the world: academically and socially.  Teachers can’t do it alone. We’ve only got 6 hours. Parents can’t do it alone.  So we’ve got to create a bond. It’s very disappointing that our profession makes parents feel like they are not an important part of a child’s life in education. Schools are a part of communities, and educators can’t exclude the parents in their efforts to help children grow to be members of the community.

Jeanette: How can we be better educators as a system in a community then?

Diane (without missing a beat!): Service learning projects. I really believe in service learning projects. As an educator, if you can bring the family together and do a service learning project from start to finish, I think we can make head way in creating a unit of family and school. And also do some very important work in our community. Maybe grow that volunteerism effort and the ability to understand people who are disadvantaged, or disabled, or in the minority. I keep thinking of Habitat for Humanity and all the varied educational experiences a child could accumulate and apply to his or her own life…now and in the future.

Jeanette: When you started working with children in special education, did your own schooling prepare in relation to “doing” social justice work?

Diane: Absolutely not.  I think whatever you learn about social justice it’s nurtured through your parents and your upbringing. An outside individual  can open the eyes of children and adults to social justice. And you can keep showing them or telling them about good practices, but they may actually live a different story.  Parents can give children the right foundation, the right messages to support their growth.

Stay tuned for our next post, where we’ll talk with Diane about her work with teachers and administrators, including how to push past your comfort zone and into change and the importance of celebrating every success.